Archive for August, 2007

Yellow Baby?

Jaundice is evil and is destroying my life. Seriously.

So in the hospital, the last day I was in, they said that Arielle looked a little pale. They did a blood test, and her bilirubin level was high – 11.7. Not horrible, but almost high enough to keep her in the hospital after I was allowed to go home. So at her first doctor appointment on Tuesday, when she was a week old, they did another blood test because she was very yellow at that point. 15.1. Great. They told me to feed her every two hours during the day and every three “or so” at night to try to flush her system out, twenty to thirty minutes per feeding. Two days later, at today’s appointment, she’d gained more weight than she needed to, so she was obviously eating well, and she looked more pink and less yellow, so I figured today’s blood test would be the last one. Which would be great, because I’m starting to feel like these people have mistaken my baby for a pincushion.

15.8 with a direct of 1.5 (really bad, in other words).

So I get to take her to the doctor for another blood test tomorrow, and they said to leave Saturday morning open for another blood test as well, since she’ll probably have to have another one then. I’m to keep her in indirect sunlight as much as possible, and I’m banned from breastfeeding until her bili goes down. That’s the part I really hate. I kind of complained a little about breastfeeding; my breasts hurt and everything, and I was starting to feel a little like a milk cow, but there was a real feeling of closeness with her when I fed her that I don’t feel now when I feed her from a bottle, and it just makes me so sad. I cried when I gave Ari her first bottle. Then there’s the fact that she doesn’t seem to like formula as much, and she doesn’t want as much as they want her to have, so I’m spending an hour at each feeding trying to force-feed my daughter. I can’t wait until this is over, but it’s going to be hard until it is. I mean, right now the schedule is: feed her for an hour, wait an hour, feed her an hour, wait an hour, and so on and so on. That’s going to suck at night. Actually, since I won’t be breastfeeding, I’ll probably just have absurd amounts of caffeine and pick up smoking again (I haven’t had a cigarette in weeks) to stay awake. There’s no point in sleeping thirty, forty-five minutes at a time, and I’d probably sleep through the alarm if I tried to nap in between feedings.


Special Delivery (Or Oh, The Pain!)

You know how they say you should always be careful what you wish for?

 They’re damn right.

So on Monday afternoon, I wrote a blog post about how I was so ready for the pregnancy to be over. I was so ready to just get childbirth over and done with. I was so ready to have the baby here. I published my blog post, stood up from the computer, and realized that my pants were soaked… my water had broken.  Now how’s that for irony?

Of course, I wasn’t quite sure what happened. I was afraid that my water had broken, but I hadn’t had any contractions. I wasn’t in labor. I wasn’t supposed to be in labor for weeks. I remembered reading that sometimes pregnant women had bad bladder control. That hadn’t happened to me, but maybe this was the first time. (Yeah, I was clutching at straws.)

I finally decided that my water had broken and I got to the hospital shortly before midnight. They started me on pitocin to induce labor, but it didn’t work well; it gave me horrid contractions, but they didn’t make me dilate at all. Everything seemed to be going wrong. I had to be constantly monitored, and the nurses kept having trouble finding a heartbeat. After fifteen or twenty minutes of searching, they might find it, but it was very faint and they would lose it after a few minutes; then they had to find it all over again. The baby’s heartbeat was very erratic, and it would often drop dangerously during contractions. This all went on until about 10:00 AM Tuesday morning. I’d had an ultrasound a few hours earlier. At the ultrasound, everything was fine. The baby was head-down, the umbilical cord wasn’t doing anything funky, the placenta looked normal. I was almost out of amniotic fluid, but aside from that, everything seemed perfectly normal.

I asked the nurse if I could be detached from the monitors for a couple of minutes to run to the bathroom. She agreed, after groaning a bit about having to find the heartbeat yet again once I got back. She moved the sheet that had been covering me aside, and gasped, “That’s a lot of blood!” She snapped something quick into a walkie-talkie-type thing and within two minutes, people were coming in and getting me ready to be moved into the operating room. Five minutes later I was down the hall getting a spinal block, and ten minutes after that, they were opening me up. My mom got there a few minutes later; it took a few minutes for her to get properly dressed to come into the operating room, and they felt they couldn’t wait. Everything happened so fast, it felt like I’d just been sucked into a tornado. Arielle was born in short order, at 10:37, and they let me look at her for a quick moment and kiss her forehead before whisking her away to the nursery; normally, they allow you to hold the baby before they take them, but they said they were too worried about her condition.

Later, they told me that the placenta had ripped away from the uterus, which caused all the bleeding. The amniotic sac had filled with blood; Arielle had swallowed and inhaled a lot of it. I had lost a lot of blood and I was in danger as well; I have no idea how long I’d been bleeding on the L&D table and hadn’t even realized it; I just thought the liquid I was losing was more amniotic fluid, which had been leaking steadily with the occasional gush all along. Arielle’s low heart rate was due to a knot in the umbilical cord which had tightened; if my water hadn’t happened to break that night and made me go to the hospital anyway, she would have been stillborn because of the knot. She also had managed to flip sideways; they had cut me open, thinking that they would just pull her head out, but there was nothing there! They were able to turn her and pull her out by the feet. After they pulled her out, they pumped her stomach and suctioned her lungs really quickly in the operating room to get all the blood out. Then they let me see her for a second and took her to the nursery. I was able to get her back about five and a half hours later, but my mom was able to go see her in the nursery for a little while. They were concerned because of all the blood and had to do an X-ray of her lungs to make sure the fluid was all out. They also were concerned because she was about five weeks premature.

As horrendous as everything was to that point, everything was pleasantly boring and textbook afterwards. Both of us recovered very well and quickly, and we had an uneventful stay in the hospital after they brought her back to me. She had been born on Tuesday, and we were discharged Friday.

Arielle Vera Wilson

Arielle Vera was born August 21, 2007 at 10:37 AM. She was 18 3/4 inches long and weighed in at 7 lb 1 oz. She is beautiful and is doing great, despite a difficult delivery and the fact that she was born five weeks early. I’m so happy that she’s here with me and that she is all right! Pictures will come later!

So Tired of This

Okay. The biggest thing that’s irked me about pregnancy is that nobody ever tells you how much it sucks… until you’re past the three-month mark and you’re locked in with no way out.

So right now I’ve got sixteen days to go until my due date. (Crazy, huh?) I’m getting my hospital bag packed, my contact list ready, all that good stuff. I’m so sick of being pregnant. Labor doesn’t seem so bad now, just because it will mean the end of being pregnant. For one, there’s the drinking. I didn’t think I would miss it, and I probably wouldn’t, except that every time I see someone with a beer, or I’m in a restaurant and see that they’re having a margarita special, or I see my mom slipping some coffee liqueur into a glass of milk as if nobody’s going to notice, I’m reminded that not only do I not have it, but I’m not allowed to have it, which makes me want it more. I’m really not a big drinker, but nine months is a little much.

I’m ready to be able to lie down comfortably in bed. I’m ready to stop having stabbing pains in my groin area. I’m ready to be able to go an entire hour without peeing. I’m ready to have the lung capacity to take a deep breath. I’m really ready to be able to sleep on my stomach or back again. I’m ready to go ahead and get through labor, just so I don’t have to be scared of it any more.

I’m ready to see Arielle. I’m ready to stop worrying about whether she’ll be okay. I’m ready to see what she looks like, to hear what her voice sounds like (as if every screaming newborn doesn’t sound the same, but I still want to hear her, if that makes any sense). I’m ready to start my life as a mother. Okay, I’m not ready, but I’m eager, and that should count for something.

Sixteen days. How crazy is that?

School Troubles

So I have six classes left to take before I’m done with my basics. Two natural sciences, one psychology/sociology, two government, one math/reasoning. Of all of those subjects, there’s three classes available online in the fall, so I figured I’d retake my math class, which I’m not doing too hot in. In order to keep my medical insurance, I have to maintain full-time student status, which means four classes. So I finally get my classes together, and guess what?

Apparently I can’t register because “State Testing Required”. Say I: What the fuck?! What do you mean, state testing??? I’ve got shit to do! I have to get registered! What the hell is state testing? Why didn’t someone tell me at some point that I had to go through some sort of testing in order to register for classes?

I’m just so frustrated at this point. Not only are half the classes I need unavailable, but when I finally try to sign up for some, I’m unable to. What bullshit.

Vita? WTF is that???

n.   pl. vi·tae (vī’tē, vē’tī)

  1. A curriculum vitae.
  2. A short account of a person’s life.

No, it’s not a stripper name. It’s my new blog. I realized that I had a blog for political writing and a blog for commenting on other articles and issues and stuff, but no blog about me. I’m not sure anyone will be interested in reading this, but I’m writing it anyway. So there!

 So I guess a little bit of background information about me is in order, seeing as how I’m the main point of this blog. Wow, I sound so conceited. So here we go.

  1. I’m expecting a little girl in September.
  2. I’m dating The Randomized Guy/The Beguiler/Jaime, who’s a really cool guy, except that he lives way too far away.
  3. I loathe Times New Roman font.
  4. I think about weird stuff, like what the offspring of a bat and a hamster would look like. I think they’d be pretty cute, actually. A winged hamster? With little fangs? Adorable.
  5. I wholeheartedly believe that Sex and the City was one of the greatest television shows ever made.
  6. My guilty pleasure? I spend way too much money on drinks at Sonic like blue-coconut-vanilla-Cokes.
  7. Don’t bother trying to figure out my style of dress. There is none. One day I’ll be in jeans and a T-shirt, the day after, I’ll be boho-ed out, and next, I’ll be all in pink.
  8. No matter what I’m wearing up top, it’s almost always flip-flops down below, though. I’m trying to get out of that habit and get to where I can be comfortable in shoes, though.
  9. I’m a history major with an art minor, and I want my teaching certification.
  10. I love my family, they’re my life right now.
  11. I read far too much. I don’t go anywhere without at least one book.
  12. I live in Houston. Actually, I wish I lived in Houston, but I live in Hockley, which is a tiny place on the outskirts of Houston. However, if I tell people I live in Hockley, they reply, “Hockley? Where’s that???”, so it’s just easier to say Houston.
  13. I love arguing, debating, or discussing politics and such. What fun, what fun.
  14. I can’t think of anything else to say.

On The Baby Front

So in past personal blogs, like my MySpace blog, I’ve included updates on what’s going on with my pregnancy. However, I haven’t done that in a while, so I’ll catch you guys up. I’m 37 weeks along as of today. So I’m between “full term” and “due”. So in other words, it could happen at any minute, but it’s more likely than not to wait a couple of more weeks. But I could be in labor tonight. Who knows?

My baby should be around six pounds right now, but is actually about seven and a half; so she’s going to be a little bigger than average, most likely. She’s about twenty inches long at this point, and she’s running out of room for some of the somersaults she was doing a month ago. Now, she’s settled down into a head-down position, and her feet are even staying in the same spot, so I have about a three-by-three-inch area that’s getting very sore from kicking while the rest of me is left alone, for the most part.

Right now, I’m pretty much just anxious and tired of playing the waiting game. I’m tired of being huge, and I’m tired of looking at all of this baby stuff all over my room and house and not having any use for it. I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’ll have to go through labor, and right now I just wish it would get over with, so I wouldn’t have to worry about it any more.